Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Totally Terrible Garbage: The Worst Of FoC In 2010

Earlier, I posted a year-end list of my favorite FoC posts from the past year. You have to take the bad with the good so here are the ones that didn't work, needed more work or just plain sucked:

7) Eric Owens: Intense

I put absolutely no effort into this one. I just copied the story from the back of the card. Granted, it was a good story about him but still... that's card-blogging at its very laziest.

6) He's A Friar Now, Damn It!

This isn't the shortest or the worst entry but it was admittedly half-hearted. As noted in the post, I literally wrote it on my way out the door.

5) "Mud, you're the best, man."

Another example of my laziness, this entry consisted of nothing but a link to Gaslamp Ball's account of Sut's infamous visit with Matty V. and Mud back in '06.

4) You Write The Caption Contest, Volume 1

Undoubtedly, the first volume will also be the last. The contest was an absolute flop. Only three people submitted a caption and, after I declared them all co-winners, no one bothered to e-mail their address to me in order to claim their prize. Good in concept but terrible in execution.
3) Here's Some Filler ('06 UD Ben Johnson)

The title says it all. The entirety of the post is the transcript of an approximately three second exchange between me and a friend of mine.

2) Can Matt Antonelli Please Have #9 Back?

Oh, this was embarrassing. I wrote an empassioned plea that Antonelli be given his preferred uniform number of 9 as opposed to the 10 that the club issued him since nobody else on the 40 man roster was assigned that number. It was promptly pointed out to me that coach Ted Simmons was in possession of that digit. After the season, when Simmons left the organization, I was optimistic that Matt would be able to get his old number back next season. Alas, it was not to be as he was non-tendered and recently signed on with the Nationals.
1) Bruce Bochy: Dead To Me

This one sums up "phoning it in". It consisted of merely one sentence- an obscene, resentful and parenthetical sentence at that. This was shamefully my only post for the month of November.

Top Thirteen Goodness: The Best of FoC in 2010

Well, it's the end of the year and that means one thing: "best of" lists. I was going to do a ten best list but, as Sam of 11 Points says, "Top ten lists are for cowards". Since 11's his thing and besides, "Top Eleven Goodness" can't be abbreviated TTG, I decided on twelve. I was unsure between two posts for the final spot so I expanded it to thirteen. I'll be following this up with a "worst of" list...

13) Brian Johnson and Jeff Pearlman: Personal Heroes

This one was about my admiration of forward-thinking former Padres catcher Brian Johnson and his friend: author, sportswriter and blogger Jeff Pearlman

12) Fried Chicken And A Puddle

It's a story John Kruk once told me about him and Tony Gwynn. I thought about using a different Tony post for this list just because I managed to sneak a Bruce Springsteen video in it but I think this one is ultimately better.
11) 7 Random Facts About Garry Templeton

The day before, I asked readers what card I should write about next. There was a choice between five players and Templeton tied with Steve Finley. The comments were used as a tiebreaker.

10) A 'n' G Lies

This post about an Allen & Ginter of former face of the franchise Adrian Gonzalez combines two of my favorite things: Guns 'n' Rose's G 'n' R Lies album and badmouthing Jake "Cy Young, Dumb and Full Of Cum" Peavy.

9) Everybody Loves Blummer (No Pressure, No Problems)

I really enjoyed writing this one. It was a follow-up to the previous day's Sean Burroughs And My Hatred Of The Word "Potential". It's less about Blum and Burroughs than it is about expectations and how they skew perceptions.

8) This Tuesday's Guest: SDPads1 from RJ's Fro on Wally Joyner

Just what it sounds like. In FoC's second guest spot, SDPads1 of RJ's Fro and .400 In '94 wrote about Wally World's tenures in San Diego as both a player and as a hitting coach.
7) Ten Trivia Gems

Featuring ten pieces of information you may or may not know about Padres history. Pictured are four cards: two Caminitis, a Greg Vaughn and a Sean Burroughs. Since this was a May post, even Burroughs was rocking some beard.

6) This Thursday's Guest: Steve From White Sox Cards on Shawn Abner

As the title states, Steve from the excellent White Sox Cards blog wrote about former Number 1 draft pick Shawn Abner who spent time with both clubs among others. It was FoC's third guest post.

5) The Klesko Facial Hair Chronicles: Volumes 1 (Facehawk), 2 (Chopgoat), 3 & 4 (Circlegoats) and 5 (Chinblock and Soul Triangle)

While this was four posts, I'll count it as one since it was a series spread out over a few days. It was part of The Month Of The Beard festivities.

4) Archi!

This was the first of three guest posts this year. It was written by Friars fan and friend of the site Alex Kasendorf. It's about watching games with his dad when he was a lad.

3) The FoC 100th Post Celebratory Review and Beardstravaganza

This post came near the end of May (a.k.a. Beard Month). It includes fourteen cards featuring various stages of beardedness.

2) My Month In Zanesville (Featuring Token Mentions of Jay Payton & Chris Young)

This is one of the longest FoC posts ever. It mentions when Chris Young nearly threw a no-hitter while I was spending 30 days in Jay Payton's hometown. It includes excerpts from letters I wrote home during that month.

1) Baseball Heals All Wounds (A Tale Of Joey Cora, My Mom & Me)

This is my favorite thing I've ever written. It's a heartwarming (gasp!) story about how baseball brought my mother and I back together. I wrote it on her birthday.

Monday, December 27, 2010

The One Where I Write About Matt Clement

A few days before the 2001 season began, the Friars sent Matt Clement, Eric Owens and somebody by the name of Omar Ortiz to Miami for Mark Kotsay and the immortal Cesar Crespo. Obviously, Owens, Clement and Kotsay were the main pieces of the deal. Fleer was able to make note of the new locales but didn't have new action shots by the time presses ran.
By the time of the trade, Clement had pretty much worn out his welcome in San Diego. In his second season, he was worse than the first. He lost 17 games and led the league in walks and wild pitches. He didn't fare much better in black and teal and was shipped to Chicago 364 days later. Eventually he was named an All Star with Boston in 2005, his penultimate season. Probably best remembered for his various goatees, Clement has gotten back to his roots. He now spends his days in suits and sweats as the basketball coach of his high school alma mater.

Monday, December 13, 2010

Tiny Tony's Gone (Tales Of Walk-Offs And Mushrooms)

I know he's a filthy effin' Dodger now but I can't hate him. I know, I know he chose to sign with them under his own free will but I get it. He still gets to play as close to his hometown as possible now that playing in his hometown isn't an option and they gave him a Major League deal which, let's face it, not a whole lot of other teams were lining up to do. He'd been my favorite Padre since we got him from Milwaukee for Jody and he got to PETCO after the game had started, walked as a pinch hitter in the ninth and came around to score the walk-off run- all of which happened while I was on mushrooms. The last time I had done mushrooms before that was when Adrian hit an 18th-inning three-run walk-off shot against the Reds in May of '08 when I was wandering the Earth like Kane from Kung-Fu...